My demon

by Korin
(Florida)

I have dealt with depression for what seems like the majority of my life. Recently I have been diagnosed with BPD and told I suffer from emotional dysregulation disorder.

I feel so alone and nobody seems to understand. I feel like I have this force that is so powerful inside of me and it is pulling me down. I fight to make it through each moment. I try to use my coping skills, but this force within me is so strong. I have learned to control it most of the time, but it tears through my mind taunting me as it shreds apart my dreams.

I also suffer from severe chronic pain with severe back spasms. I am 36 and I have upgraded from a cane to a walker because of my instability when walking.

I fight to survive each moment and battle that demon inside of me. I don't want to battle anymore, if I have to be here then I want to start living!
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My heart goes out to you~! If only there was something I or anyone could do to help you. Have you ever tried energy healing? Maybe a well-established Reiki healer? Or acupuncture? I'm so very sorry for all your suffering and I hope and pray you get your wish and start living.

There is an organisation called NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness). They offer support and understanding, and opportunities to meet people who DO understand. There are local chapters for people to get together.

with love
Laura