GRAND DAUGHTER

by bob quinlan
(freeburg, il)

My grand daughter is 3 and her mother just moved out of the marital home. She stays with each parent off & on, back & forth. She has issues with not wanting to be left alone and talks to herself asking "why is my family leaving." What can we do as grandparents to help?

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Oh gosh I don't know! My grand daughter has really been through it and oh it is so excruciating to me!

I don't think it helps when I get tied in knots about worst case scenarios and projecting all I know about abandonment issues! Being reassuring is the best. Reassuring yourself, your child, your grand child.

What helps me is to know that we humans are not here to have perfect serene life experiences. That there is divine love available to all of us at all times. That each of us is given circumstances that yes, wound us. AND that it is the wounds, the cracks, our broken hearts that let the light through eventually.

We can't know that these difficulties are bad, they someday may be the impetus for great strength, love, compassion. May inspire a desire to serve the world.

Trust your grand daughter to smile and love and have a great life. Say to her and your child, "You can still have a great life."

with love
Laura