Fear of Abandonment ---I'm Done feeling like this

by Lost
(Australia)

I've had issues with my father since i was a little girl. i dont remember him ever doing anything with me as a child. The only things i do remember is he being drunk all the time and just having a bad temper. He scared me as a child and he still does. i have no relationship with him what so ever but i want one. i dealt with depression for 3 years during high school and i dont wanna go back there ever again but im afraid im heading there. Everytime i start a new relationship i always seem to sabotage myself and try an change him. and these days i dont even know im doing it. I have trust issues and have the attitude that i dont see the point in trying if i know its gonna fail. But im done feeling this way, i wanna be happy and i wanna be able to hold a relationship for more then a couple of weeks. Im doing this for me but also for the guy in my life because i dont want to see him walk away. please just give me some advice about how i can change and stop feeling so down because im sick of being unhappy and always pushing everyone away from me, its not healthy and i cant handle it anymore. i cant do this on my own. Please help
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I'd like to help. The way I know how to help is to do sessions. That is what helps. I also put a lot of help on the site. See Emotional Release. Do it! Do it at least every other day.

Also, you likely suffer from repeated traumatic experiences with your father and you must resolve these. You MUST. Again, what are a few typed words worth? But here are some: Remember a time when he scared you and then imagine you become a super hero and you take care of it! Maybe you knock him into bed so he goes to sleep. Maybe you force him to a hospital. Maybe you lock the doors so he can't get in. Maybe you move away with only good happy friends and family. Imagine it working out for the better and you feel relieved and safe.

Imagine what you REALLY WANTED then. Know that you deserve and can have that. INSIST. Refuse to settle for less.

Imagine, NOW, what would be a life of your dreams. What would it be like? How would you be? vision this.

You need to balance all the dark and hopeless with some other energies! You need to let your brain and body and heart have some experiences of success, of power, of choice, of wanting good and getting it.

with love
Laura