Depression Poems - MY INNER CHILD (1991)

by margaret parker
(virginia)

Depression Poems

My inner child
was never young.
She was always so busy
taking care of things
or pretending that
getting hurt didn't matter
or that feeling lonely
wasn't so bad.

My child looked in the mirror
and she saw guilt and ugliness.
She didn't recognize anger,
she felt no love'
and wasted no energy on laughter.

She sat passively
waiting to be noticed,
wanting to be cared for
never looking needy
wanting desperately to be held.

I can only imagine
the tragic horrors
that my child witnessed.
Did the abuse become so routine
that it didn't matter anymore?
Did my child run away
leaving her emotions behind?

I can't seem to digest
my tortured past.
I"ve found the place
where in my heart
I'v found the girl that remembers
but she's so frightened
so shamed
that she doesn't want to share her secrets.
I am finally ready to be her true friend.